It Ends...

Tonight I finished an upbill battle. Life is hard women! Some things are even harder to deal with than losing weight. I know this forum is for us to discuss our weight battles, but I feel it's all about life, and everything that emcompasses. I ended things with the guy I'm seeing. For weeks now we've gone around and around trying to define what it is we're doing. I want a relationship, I'd give anything to BE with him. But he doens't want a relationship (he was clear about that from the beginning) BUT he adores me, and loves everything at me. It makes no sense to me. The things, moments, and feelings he's given to me are not measurable. They are beyond any way any man has ever made me feel. That alone speaks volumes to me. But I'm tired of fighting, tired of silently begging for someone to want what I want. Maybe our paths will cross at a later date, who knows, but I can't hold out hope for that. All I can do is take some time now to think about what's gone on, remember the good times, and move on. Hopefully stronger and wiser. Tonight, at this point, having just ended it an hour ago, I still feel tore up inside and mentally weak.

Tomorrow will be a good day though! I'm taking my boys fishing for the first time and we're going out to Maricopa to look at a house for sale I might try to buy. THAT is all super exciting! AND I'm feeling MUCH better with the bronchitis. I'm probably running at 80%, so I'm planning on working out everyday from here to marathon time, maybe just not so hard the first few days and see what my lungs can handle. I have 5 more days of meds, so I figure I won't be 100% until I'm done w/ those. Wish me luck! Marathon, here I come! I figure it's the best way to move on, throw myself into exercise and blast some man hating music! Any ideas? Any good songs I should get that won't make me long for him? haha!

xoxo,
Liz

Comments

  1. DebiFebruary 13, 2010 at 3:57 AM

    I'm sorry it didn't work out with your boyfriend Liz, but sometimes it IS best to end the relationship, rather than to continue on when the two of you aren't wanting the same things. You deserve someone who will be your everything, and wants a serious relationship with you too!!

    Tomorrow will be a great day! First fishing with your son's, and then to look at a house!! How fantastic for you.

    I will definitely cross my fingers that you get over your Bronchitis in time to be able to continue training for your marathon! Have fun tomorrow!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. jennyr1222February 13, 2010 at 7:13 AM

    First off, I truly believe this is s forum for us to talk about whatever we want to, so you talk on lady! Sorry to hear about the men, but it sounds like you're instincts are good. Men don't make much sense (as we dont make much sense to them). I dated a guy for two years that I knew never wanted to get married and have kids and yet I stuck around thinking I could change him. You did good by ending it and while it's hard, you're beautiful and hilarious and will find something that wants everything with you soon. Songs = SINGLE LADIES! Very empowering and good to run to. ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. MBFebruary 13, 2010 at 7:26 AM

    I'm sorry about that. I know those things are tough. Hang in there!!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Lap Band GroupieFebruary 13, 2010 at 7:36 AM

    Good for you for recognizing you weren't on the same path and moving on sooner rather than later. I'm sure it was painful. Exercise those emotions out! -BG

    ReplyDelete
  5. NataliaFebruary 13, 2010 at 8:24 AM

    Good luck on your half marathon! What a great accomplishment that will be!!!

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  6. Liz - Lizzle - Libby LouFebruary 13, 2010 at 9:26 AM

    Thank you ladies! Your support is so encouraging! I know I will be just fine!

    ReplyDelete
  7. The Best MeFebruary 13, 2010 at 9:48 AM

    I am proud of you for making the best choice for you. That takes major guts!

    ReplyDelete
  8. THE DASH!February 13, 2010 at 6:57 PM

    Hey Lizzie,
    I'm so sorry I missed all of this.. I have been awol lately.
    Sad news about you and the man... nothing I can really say to help it better - but just know I'm thinking of you.
    Also, I hadn't realised you were sick. You do sound like you're on the mend now - but ack - bronchitis? That's yuck. Chin up chick and happy house hunting.

    ReplyDelete
  9. RamonaFebruary 15, 2010 at 7:57 AM

    Liz, HUGS! I'm sure you know that I've been dealing with the same thing for a long time now and really, if he isn't that into you enough right now to be what you need, then you were right to do your own thing. Love ya girl. Email me anytime. HUGS

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  10. Liz - Lizzle - Libby LouFebruary 15, 2010 at 9:08 PM

    I am slowly trying to get over the dude but he keeps calling. I had a feeling he'd want it when he couldn't have it...but it's done for me. Maybe months from now if he decides he "for real" wants something, not just b/c it seems like a fun game. We'll see. I am not focusing on him or that. I've been seeing FINE men all over the place but I'm focusing my attention on my upcoming half marathon and my babies... no men stuff for a bit!

    Thanks dash and Ramona! You both are such sweethearts!

    ReplyDelete

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